fulllifeconsequences

Don't. Don't go again. Please.

[They're upset again, they're freaking out again, hadn't they started to get better? Should've just left it as pretending to be Sans should have stopped the conversation there.]

i'm s

[Don't apologize.]

i won't. i won't do it anymore chara please don't go again

chara?

don't go again i'm sorry don't leave

[Their phone's going off, and the little noises feel like sirens carving into their skull. Don't be silent. Don't be silent. Silence did this. You did this.

There's Frisk, there's Toriel, but nothing matters more than Asriel. Than not being silent again.]

i told mom
please dont be alone until you're ok

it was a week ago im fine i promise i don't

i don't want you hurting yourself ok

please Asriel

I let go because you wanted me to. Let Frisk be happy let Frisk live their life. I thought it would help. I didn't want to make it worse all I do is hurt you all I do is make it worse!

Tell me what to do. Tell me how to ease your suffering not add to it. Tell me how to make it ok.

wait chara what are you talking about when

when did i say that????

The end. Everyone on the surface, nobody dead but me and six other nameless children.

[Asriel... a flower, but still alive. Alone, but still alive. What a happy ending, right?

Deep breath. Breathe. Keep breathing. Chara is nothing but a memory, in every sense of the word. Only heard it once, but listened. Held fast to it. Recall, recite. It's grounding to recite. To focus on repeating what others have said. To parrot from the script.]

Seems as if everyone is perfectly happy. Monsters have returned to the surface. Peace and propserity will rule across the land. Take a deep breath. There's nothing left to worry about.

Well. There is one thing. One last threat. One being with the power to erase EVERYTHING... Everything everyone's worked so hard for.

...

You know who I'm talking about, don't you? That's right. I'm talking about YOU. YOU still have the power to reset everything. Toriel, Sans, Asgore, Alphys, Papyrus, Undyne... If you so choose... Everyone will be ripped from this timeline... and be sent back before all of this ever happened. Nobody will remember anything. You'll be able to do whatever you want.

[He'd been thinking it. Over all the time he'd spent over their grave, feeling the slow deterioration beginning to consume his body, nerves numbing and feelings fading. Being left alone after everyone returned to the surface, he started thinking of exactly what to tell them.

But he'd never gotten that far. He actually did it, pushed Chara out of his life, told them to never come back, that they would ruin everything. At the time, he meant it. Stood by it. Was firm about that. But now?

They're here, scared for him, nothing like... that creature he'd seen in the bad timelines. This is different, very different.]

It doesn't mean that applies here.

[Trying to be calm, trying not to run off, himself.]

There's no Resets, no bad timelines, no

you don't have to leave ok.

You didn't believe I would do it. You thought you had already begged me a hundred times to let everyone be happy.

If I get past Sans. If I hurt you in a way worse than any other timeline hurt you. Then you were right. In our memory, Frisk's and mine, we stopped at him. Went back, and ended on the timeline where you ask this of me.

If you remember more than that, however, there are still bad timelines. There are bad timelines that go all the way to the end.

I can't lie and say that it won't have to happen, that we'll just be here and we can finally deviate from the script. Because I left here before. And I don't even remember it. And you know only a True Reset can really

I'm sorry I reacted the way I did. I panicked. How many timelines has it been? How many years?

I no longer know. I don't. But... don't apologize. You were not wrong. Your feelings are not wrong. They're yours.

Asriel. Let me ask you something. Do you believe there was a purpose to our reincarnation? That we were summoned here for a reason? That there is meaning behind the fact we still exist.

Because we're crucial to the script. Back there, at least. You can't remove an asset that keeps it going otherwise the universe starts grasping at straws, trying to find something to fill that void.

But here? I can't say. I don't know why this world wants us at all, or keeps adding and removing components.

I don't believe I'm essential to that world. Nobody knew I was there. Nobody acknowledged my presence. You only called my name when you saw emptiness and dust.

Here, I have had time to think. I have been told my purpose is not strength. I have been told what awaits in our world, should I ever return to it. True Resets. An ambition that is not enough to stop the endless looping. Punishment that does not actually discourage. I will not change, will I? I will be exactly what you believe me to be. We will all forget this. You will fear me. Frisk will not look to me as a friend, or someone meant to be part of their happy ending.

But here...

[They aren't entirely empty. Here, the refrain of "not really human" has died down, tapered off, become something different. Here, Frisk calls Chara their best friend, says they'd be missed. Here, it's not just... settling for a vicarious happiness. They're really part of the world, not just an interloper, a spectator, a parasite.

They have been given guidance, and they think... they might be responding to it.]

I think there is a reason. I think I have been brought here so... all of you can be safe. So maybe there is a chance to divert the world from the fate I would impose on it. Prevent a reset by force.

I don't think I want to go back, Asriel. I think I have a chance to figure out how to root myself to this world permanently, and I am going to do my best to make that happen. I do not know if I have the power to change in our world. I think I will become the very worst thing I can be, because you already remember me doing so. But here... maybe things really can be different.

Does that sound naive? Maybe I'm just making excuses. I would not blame you if you do not believe a word of it. But in this world, I don't want to be... I don't want to be the last remaining threat. I don't want to make you fear. I don't want to be the reason you erase yourself from existence.

Name the fallen human.

[The first step. The first screen they see before they can get anywhere or start any timelines. To name Chara. Without that, would there be a universe? Without them, would Frisk have freed all the monsters out of the Underground? Would there be a System_Information_962 in the bad ones?]

Look, even with the SOULs, even when I completely reprogrammed the entire universe, it still wasn't enough. It's the script, Chara, and it's... it's Frisk's story, really. So don't beat yourself over any of it, okay? As long as I know you were still there in the good timelines, that's enough. You're enough.

If I go back myself, there's going to be a True Reset. There always will be. I'll be back as Flowey, torturing you and Frisk until, in one of those timelines, I drive you to do what you do.

They said I left here too, Chara. Except I was Flowey. Look what happened to me.

I promise, it's okay.

[Scared of silence. Scared of what happens when they hear him calling, but don't answer. But they're torn, too. Scattered. Full of things they want to say, but aren't ready to. Might never say. They've given up on "sorry," because sorry is just a meaningless word. Sorry isn't good enough. It's too late for sorry.

They don't want to say it at all. Feels like an excuse. Feels weak. But silence is... they can't tune this out. Can't run away.]

I don't know how else to make it up to you. I don't know how to repent.

This is different. You're... you're gonna do a good job, Chara. I believe in you.

Wait. No fair. I'm supposed to be comforting you, not the other way around.

I put you through a lot more. It's the least I can do, isn't it?

That's backwards too. I mean it, Asriel. Don't apologize. Don't blame yourself. I know you blamed yourself, but... you weren't wrong. You weren't wrong at all.

You were scared. You didn't really understand what I was dragging you into, did you?

Sometimes it was hard to understand what you really wanted, Chara. You never really talked about yourself back then, and I respected that. Whatever happened to you on the Surface must've been really really bad.

But I didn't think 'taking the SOULs' would mean

like that

What happened to me on the surface was nobody's business. Not even yours.

[Send. Silence. ...Regret. Too harsh. He never pushed to know. He never asked questions that can't be answered happily. He did respect that.]

When you saw how sick Asgore got when we used buttercups. When I asked you to go get flowers for me. I thought you... knew what it meant. I thought you'd know for sure what it took to get a SOUL, if I...

[He was just a kid. Some things are beyond a child's understanding. You're wise beyond your years, Chara. You're an old soul, Chara. You're practically an adult in a child's skin, Chara. Turns out they were right, weren't they?

Most kids don't understand death as intimately as someone who climbs a mountain for an unhappy reason. Most kids just get scared and upset when their dad gets sick, don't file away the cause and effect of it as a tool to be used later on. They expected far too much of someone far too young.]

I was too hasty. Always too hasty. Swept up in my own foolish momentum.

[Toriel looks at her child through the mirror- or, rather. A duplicate. Not quite them, just the same way as the one on this side isn't quite them. Of course, her version of them never truly existed at all- and yet the memories feel real.

So she still feels upset, seeing some version of them that's like this. They have drive, and determination- and instead of using it for anything good, they instead used it to harm monsters. Harm her people. All while still claiming to hold their own race in such contempt.

There are no excuses. She knows the truth. She hates that this is the only way she can communicate- but it needs to be said. Or at least, written.]

You really are no different from them, Chara.

[Oh. Words on a mirror. Their own mirror has never spoken to them - Chara isn't even sure if they're real enough to warrant a mirror version of themselves - so this must be somebody else! Familiar handwriting, they... think? They're sure they've seen that hand before, but maybe not... for a long time?

Whatever.]

Let me guess. Frisk? Or maybe you're Asriel. He's got to have a copy now too, no?

Such a pitiful thing, not even recognizing their own mother.

[Not actually their mother. Don't care about this child at all- just looking to hurt them. To remind them of what they really are, that they're undeserving of love, since her Real clearly isn't cut out for the task.

Not that she expects Chara to actually disagree with her.]

What else would I expect from a human that murders and kills indiscriminately? There is no room in your disgusting heart for compassion.

Only a child, and already so much like the rest of your race.

* IC Inbox

text - THESE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT

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Message on a Mirror, 7/6

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