fulllifeconsequences

Hey, thanks for letting it stop with Alex. He probably deserved it. Max doesn't. So yeah, that was cool of you.

Dipper what the hell

What did Max tell you?

That you didn't kill her? Why?

Didn't show you her bruises, did she.

Well we were on the phone so no. You two fought then?

How soft do you think I am? Did you imagine we hugged and wept and made up?

Oh my god are you trying to make sure your scary rep is still intact?

Don't worry you're still weird and creepy.

And yet you felt it necessary to take a few precious minutes out of your day to thank me for not murdering someone.

I think the one being weird here is you, Dipper. Do you often send thank-you cards like these?

Because this situation could have escalated into an all out war and it didn't.

[Well, when he puts it like that...

...Chara kind of regrets not going through with it.]

I'm actually a little flattered. You believe I could fight a war all on my own?

[Because Chara does. If the cause matters enough to them.]

It seems to me that one preteen versus the whole world might be a bit one-sided. Think I could win?

I don't think anyone could win. What do you think winning would even mean in a war here?

It would mean a way to ERASE.

[Chara might believe they could take on the whole world... but the cause doesn't matter to them anymore. Erase the world. Erase themselves. They'll embrace either.]

[Oh boy. More creepiness. To be fair, Dipper isn't sure what he was expecting.]

Erase?

Sorry, autocorrect. I meant a way to elf. I'm, like, super into LARPing.

[Yeeeeeah convincing. Dipper doesn't buy that for a minute. But he's also pretty sure Chara will just be a jerk if he presses. He'll figure it out. He's good at that.]

Well if you want in on my DD&MD game just ask. Only imaginary stabbings are allowed, though.

I feel like there are maybe too many letters in that abbreviation. Dungeons, Dragons, and... More Dragons?

Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons. I guess some worlds call it Dungeons and Dragons? It's different, though. Our dice have more sides.

Okay, but are there dungeons?

[The offer alone is enough to make them laugh. It's so silly and pointless and nerdy. The novelty's just too much to resist.]

I'll play. I don't want to be a human though. Can I play some kind of goat person? I'd settle for a horse or dog or something, maybe.

I thought you wanted to play an elf. Wasn't that the whole point?

[Or gee did you actually mean erase after all?]

You mean elves don't look like goats? What kind of weirdo elves do you have running around in your world?

None. We don't have elves in our world. Most of the time anyway.

You can play a satyr if you want. They're goat people.

A satyr, then. The goatiest one the game will let me make, okay? I don't want a human that's just sort of halfheartedly trying to be a goat.

You really don't like humans huh.

You also definitely don't entirely get how DD&MD characters work but that's okay, we can work on character creation later. Your satyr can be as goaty as you want since it's pretty much all imagination. I mean the stats will be the same either way.

You don't know the half of it. You're human too, so don't get too insufferable.

Anyway, my character will work however I decide they will. I already know exactly what they will look like.

So are you human or not? Cause I'm still not totally clear on that.

If you want to play in the game, your character has to work the way the rules say they can. But looks you can definitely pick.

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